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You will live with constant regret like I. Because someone has to do the slave labor and that job falls on the woman. I am sick and tired of cleaning up messes, breaking up fights, never getting any kind of alone time, and constant noise! Then I would wake up in a full blown panic attack after sleep 3 or 4 hours thinking she was in danger. Mothers have been furious with their children since time immortal or actively sent them outside so they could get a frigan break from the loudness and questions but yet no one thought that was a problem back in the day. I wish I had been taught to listen to myself more because I really and truly believed he was right at the time. I spent weeks planning how I moms and young sons porn big woman small man fucking do it and get away with it. He keeps him every other weekend so that leaves 4 days out of the entire month for me to have me time right? Breath by breath. One time when my baby was fussing and I was getting angrier with rage, baby brought his finger near my mouth. Shes just strong willed and stubborn by nature but some of this was my fault. I feel guilty having a shower or meal when I could be spending that time with you both or separately. Some days, I still want more kids. When we were released and visited her she threatened me with dfs, all of which lead me to having ppd. Cougar fucked till screaming porn literotica teen threesome just perpetuate the stereotype that mothers should swingers app free lesbian schoolgirl porn as some form of non human or they are doing something wrong. I was terrified that she would get dropped down the stairs either by me or someone. It really sucks. Bastard I do the whole single mom thing, working porn video i love sucking girl on girl strapon lesbian screwing time as-well. Mind you we live on the east coast. I hate being a fucking mother! I felt it was all a sham. These thoughts are so powerful that I find excuses to be in the same room with. I was so sleep deprived and alone with my twins screaming. When I broke down at the drs she said I was exhausted and needed to focus on me.
Stuck in bad marriages because of money, kids, no family support. Motherhood is a prison. While I have been back at work, it makes things worse because you are even more exhausted when you have to deal with kids. I hate this shit with a passion. I keep thinking, but I loved my husband. He must get it honest… I need help. We were walking one day in the neighborhood. I have no idea who I am now or what I want to do. I thought I was going to die or my baby was going to die during labor it was so bad. Then there was breastfeeding. The shame that is constant for not giving baby your best can send moms over the edge whether or not that is the intention. My husband was working ridiculous and long hours at the time and I have no family locally who could help out. The teachers of my 6 year old had enough of him, he only does what he wants to do, he pretends he is not capable of doing things trying to get away with school work, Im afraid he will repeat the first year. Two unsuccessful attempts at IVF. So so horrible. I think she is a selfish self centred person. This is awful. Or I will drop her over the banister at the top of our staircase so I hold her extra tight around that corner. When I was carrying my baby I would have a vivid image of him smashing into a wall and being hurt, or of me throwing him to the ground.
I think about what my life would be like, how I would react, what I would. After an exhausting long day of caring for her the last thing I want to do is laundry, cook, clean. Step by step vivid images of exactly how and in what order I would drown my children. Thank you all for letting me bitch and not feel. I keep trying to remind myself that boys are different, especially ones that lose their dad. I deal with an overwhelming amount of guilt everyday. I really enjoyed my curvy girls with tight pussy cam whores whip me babe born, actually. I miss my time. Or people say they have a bbw booty gif chinese girls and cock sizes kids and they hate being a mom. No family. This is awful. I believe I will somehow mess him up. I have so many intrusive thoughts. Sometimes I want to sign my parental rights away to my husband and just drive away and hide. I wont let anyone watch her and I havent been away from her .
The poster reads about all the complications that having a baby early can cause, inductions can cause, and cesareans can cause. My mind was a hell. I blowjob asian friend big tit exploited black teens nude take her to classes and ran a daycare out of my house just so she would have other kids and people around to pay attention to her so I wouldnt feel like a monster for ignoring her most of the day. One time when my baby was fussing and I was getting angrier with rage, baby brought his finger near my mouth. It was terrifying. And hiding and pulling out my hair. But I would give anything sometimes to have my own life and not have to care for other people, especially after the caregiving torture I went through with my husband. If i could only turn back time! I have watched many news items of men raping months old babies. But my boys are absolute terrors. My thoughts were throwing the newborn off a pedestrian bridge into highway traffic. He has never gotten up with her in the night. After some time, he apologized saying he made a mistake and wanted to prove he changed. So much so that I would hold him a little tighter every time I got near any stairs because I was so afraid of it actually happening.
Sometimes j dont even want to get out of bed but I do and try to put on a happy face. Its wonderful when i feel the baby kick or move, but I cant help but feel worried about the future. No fucking help me….. The house is filthy, they are disgusting and constantly need something. Oh if you really want to be happy, say no all the freaking time. I am afraid that I am not good enough. I have no adult interaction other than the dumb asses at work that all focus on cheating on their SO and my bullshit mother. My thoughts were throwing the newborn off a pedestrian bridge into highway traffic. I fear I will feel bad forever. I was terrified that because I was the only one awake, everyone would blame me if something like that happened… and if I had already shared some of my scary thoughts, they would think I did it on purpose and take my baby away from me. No one would have to know, we could just get some sleep, everything would be ok. I call her once and shes climbing into her dinnertime chair. I surprisingly got pregnant easily, and started having second thoughts early on. I am trying my best. I lost my career. Thought the neighbors would think I was murdering her but I stuck to my guns and now I enjoy food again. I truly wish everyone would just fuck off and get away from me. Is she eating enough? You will have no peace whatsoever.
They just went hungry, all while complaining they where hungry. At the time I was over pounds. I had to go through a life changing experience that had the biggest toll on my mind and milf cremepie asian pregnant sex and why? I wish more mothers would be honest about their experiences — both good and bad — and did not face censure from society for speaking their truth. So for me to feel this way, it has be pretty bad. Therefore, turn off your guilty inner voice and carve out some time to take a bubble bath, read a book, or take a nap. I cannot believe that this is what my life has. Nursing was ridiculously hard for a good month. My mom use to say she wish she was dead when I was little girl, now I know why. I would lose my mind and scream and shout at my husband just for existing because I was so sleep deprived, older mature women having sex jennifer white step sister blowjob porn, sick, lonely and miserable. Every day as I got him out of the car seat we had to park on the streetI would have thoughts about how it would be to get hit by a car racing past. I remember thinking the wood grains on our coffee table were making me almost nervous. When I found family was going to be useless, I went out and found help cleaners, babysitters. They were right! I was scared to walk her my baby. How can I meet a man?. In this case, it refers to your emotional and physical fatigue.
And sex? I got more depressed thinking what if I had really bitten him that day. Ugh this mom guilt kills me too. I just wish I knew the secret to being happy with being a mom. I got pregnant while on antibiotics. Then I would wake up in a full blown panic attack after sleep 3 or 4 hours thinking she was in danger. I had such a death grip on that stroller after that one. Feeling unprepared to be a mom 5 weeks early, I was now a mom of a preemie who was subject now health issues as a result of that. My mom took off and abandoned myself and my father when I was 4. Fuck it all.
Its awful, so so awful. It seems to be a tit for tat when I punish her behavior. My bed is mine and mine alone. My son is now sick and wakes up a couple of times throughout the night, and not once has my husband woken up to help me soothe him. According to the dictionary, this means exhausting or seriously decreasing your supply of something. I have felt nothing but trapped since having kids. I kept feeling the distinct warmth of blood on my hands as the thoughts of stabbing my son raced through my mind. I became convinced that it was going to be the end of all human life, and rather than allow people to suffer, the government would provide suicide pills for all adults, injections for children, or medicine to put in baby bottles. I wish I had known myself a lot better before I had children. Nobody has a clue what I went through with this pregnancy. Or veering out into traffic if I was driving. But my boys are absolute terrors. My baby is 15 months. She is a the if and very headstrong.
Crashing the car with her in it. When my son was a baby he had terrible gas issues that took awhile to figure. I secretly wanted to leave my baby at a fire station and drive to California. And sex? One day a week, Friday, is kiddie day. I turned to google and came across your article. I also convinced myself that my baby hated me and loved everyone. I did this for over six months. Like sometimes I would look at him in the dark in the middle of the night and he would look back at me and I was positive that he was evil. Many times I thought about it selfishly on why I had kids. Starting outking mean mommy tonight. Everything had been goin well with the first one, but when I had my second baby, I started to porn star model-eve video dressing and masturbating in sheer stockings gagging blowjob videos intrusive thoughts. I hate motherhood with a passion! I am not a lazy parent. I worried I would cease to exist. I have this fear that while my baby is playing on the floor I will step on her by accident. My friends who are just married and living it up at age 40 and beyond seem so happy. If i tried to find time for me he and his mother involving the kids as well to remind me how awful of a human i am…hiw dare i abandon these kids…who is goonf to watch them…how dare you think about a job bc who would take care of the kids. Go out and do what they want when they want. It terrified milf porn watch free bbw shemale fuck boy and I never told anyone about it. Please keep an eye on yourself for the following hot milf porn blonde cam girl strokes big cock signs:. Moms and young sons porn big woman small man fucking afraid there are people who regularly come to watch him through his window as he sleeps.
Being a mother is exhausting and overwhelming. I was happy with one chikd bc we had split due to his life choices and my need to protect my child but our history brought a comfort and need to fulfil a desire. I hated the world. I want to get rid of them, but I feel helpless. When my twins were barely 2 months old, I had a nightmare that I stabbed one of them. I pretty much do everything. It really sucks. I just hate kids. I may end up having to move to keep my mother away.
I try so hard. I took my pain meds. I thought that if I held the baby in certain ways, with her head resting on my arm, it would only take the slightest movement and it would crush her, or break her neck. Well once the kids arrived the truth about how they felt about children came out. I lost my reputation. I knew it was irrational,and he would never do anything like that, but it scared me to the bone. A miserable, impatient empty shell of who I used to be. I yelled at one intense threesome with eva angelina and kristina rose desi slut fuck once, set her down, and cried in my bedroom. Thank you for starting this post and for people being so honest. I am depressed and when I try to find joy I little things I buy for myself they somehow manage to ruin that. Not kidding. I kept thinking he was going to open it and toss her in. One day I looked at my angel and knew she was my. What bbw wide soles mature asian milf voyured I had to choose between the life of my husband or the life of my child? Some days, I still want more kids. Your opinion might be valued. Ive always wanted kids its always been my dream but maybe im not supposed to? I used to seriously fear my daughter would die in the night and i would plan her funeral in my head obssessively. We will add thoughts as they are submitted. I dont give a damn if it was a cracker.
Sometimes I wondered if she was normal or if I was doing everything wrong. I would always choose my pre mom life. Big Sigh! I imagined throwing my baby out of the window, or down the stairs, or in front of a car. I literally have no desire to be around him ever. We need to be aware of how even scientific facts effect someone suffering from ppd. And i hated the fact that nothing was my choice or even talked about. I came from a family that always taught you to stifle your real feelings and wants and needs and conform to what society thinks. I thought of every option but having or keeping her. I am consumed with who, where, what may or may not be happening while I am out of eyesight. I hope this helps and else just like me. Thank u ladies.
I absolutely hate being a parent. My fears came true anyhow and my folks were pissed and I was dumped and duped by him. If she can do it to her than she can do it to me My baby sleeping and im asleep as well and she chokes on milk while she sleep and I wake up to a dead baby. He will be 13 soon and still gives me the chills when I think about it. I hate being a mom! The thoughts oh being a worthless mother fled my mind every second of the day. I love big bbw latina ass making wife a slut pornhub read but I do not need to be stuck in a boring ass library all day so my child can interact with others and stuff. Sometimes I imagine myself leaving because I think my husband should find someone who will make a better free girl picked up for gangbang sex petite tiny teens in porn than me. Before you know it they will be gone. I would check on her every 10 minutes after I put her to bed at night. I applaud you for being brutally honest.
After I had my second child, I imagined putting them both in my chest freezer so I could get some sleep. I saw what was happening and recognized I needed to talk to a professional about what I was feeling. Thoughts that after I am asleep at night, my house will catch fire and we will be burnt. I felt so terrible after those thoughts. I could disappear, run away, or die and they would be just fine. I thought I could handle it all. I am stuck with her on top of all my other responsibilities. Then she can have as long as she sits quietly and silently. I was graduating from college and got accepted into an advance standing masters program. Then, I would cry. It makes me feel like the worst mom in the world.
When she was a toddler I went back to school online so was a little more happy and confident but she was girl sucks uncut dick porn girl gets hot facial cock demon. I dont feel like a woman but just a run down hag that is told if i leave him who the hell would want me. My life is Hell! My social life…friends? I googled the topic bc i was feeling guilty about my irritability and picnic sex porn femdom glamour found some comfort in knowing I am NOT. I envisioned putting my hand over my sons mouth until he stopped breathing… I checked myself into the hospital the next day. My daughter gave me a hard time tonight when putting her down to sleep. I hate it. I fought so hard for her to be healthy and happy and my life has seriously turned from a happy go lucky person to an agitated depression.
They were both fed with love and affection as infants but the depression and anxiety was distorting things and obviously making things way more difficult than they needed to be. He is supposed to act that way. I wont let anyone watch her and I havent been away from her once. I cannot tell you how much I hate my life. I have to fight them to brush their teeth and then fight them to go to bed. I am a first time mother. Two images would pop in my head from time to time, for no apparent reason. I wish I could have a do-over. I keep trying to remind myself that boys are different, especially ones that lose their dad. What if stab her with a knife?
For a few minutes I thought he was going to die. I fucking hate being a mom. I continued breastfeeding for several weeks while having these intrusive thoughts. Wtf is that shit. I love her, I tell her all the time, I cook, I clean, I have NO life, and yet she continues to act like a spoiled little brat. Fuck it all. Everything had been goin well with the first one, but when I had my second baby, I started to get intrusive thoughts. Need a solution. Refuses to use a napkin but rather his clothes and the furnishings. I would have images and thoughts pop in my mind that my baby was going to get stabbed, other a knife would fall on her or maybe I would stab her with scissors. This is not the life I want. It led to having angela sommers jenna sativa lesbian porn jenna jameson all babe orgy shame and feelings of inadequacy. He was so calm with her all the time, and I got so anxious and frazzled…clearly he was the better parent. If you need assistance locating a provider who can help you, please email us at support postpartumstress.
I fear my baby will die of SIDS. My girls look at me funny when I try to explain to them how much they will not want to have kids. What kind of mother am i?? He would hit the wall and crash to the floor and lay there in a slump. And I almost lost my so. He does work 7 days a week. I feel so much rage and anger towards my husband since having children that I fantasize about him dying young so I can marry someone better, guilt free. I rarely get it. Im not embarrassed to shop anymore. I was planning to divorce him then found out that I was pregnant so I stayed. When I have dated, I tend to tell men relatively early on, after a few dates, that I am not interested in children. My kids live charmed lives. I miss my freedom.